holding on, holding out

I’m increasingly thinking I need to be inpatient, and I don’t say that lightly.  I spent yesterday, day two of the massive hypotension, sucking down juice all day and trying to lay with my feet up to keep my resting BP up.  Nope.  The only things that reliably bring it up are stress/anxiety and being up and moving around, both are temporary and the up and moving also jacks up my heart rate to my high POTSy levels.  So that’s no good.  Plus, I’m dizzy while I’m up.

The two days of juice have taken their toll on my stomach I think.  Well, that’s what my theory is for why I woke up this AM with stomach pain which quickly progressed to nausea.  Took a zofran.  An hour later, I was vomiting.  I swear, all zofran does for me is constipate.

The juice, white grape juice, is less acidic than gatorade, but it still is sharp on my stomach.  I am hoping two days of high acid in my stomach is what it was that set things off today…I’m pretty unhappy that I’m puking now too, on top of all this blood pressure crap.

My husband leaves tomorrow for his conference, which he is already planning to cut short since I’m so sick.  A good friend (out of state) is coming up to hang out with me while he’s gone.  I’m not accustomed to having company while I’m so sick, basically she’s going to have to minimally baby sit me (and possibly take me to the ER and watch my cats until my husband gets home) and I am not looking forward to that.  I had been hoping this would be more of a visit, but the last few days are not looking good.

So my husband’s coming back Sunday night, cutting his conference attendance short, which sucks.  But I’m glad.  Because this sucks too, and it’s scary, and the only reason I’m not pushing the doctors to admit me is that I don’t want to be in the hospital while he’s out of town.

I was supposed to check in with Neuro today, about the mirtazipine.  I’m sure they’re going to be unhappy that I discontinued it, but I really feel I had good reason to do so.  Of course, today’s nausea and vomiting doesn’t help my  case that without mirtazipine, I can at least tolerate a liquid diet.  😦  But up until today, I was doing much better OFF the mirtazipine than on, stomach-wise.

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