twinkle twinkle

I have migraine.  It started, or at least made itself known, last night.  Everything was fine!  I was eating and thinking “woo hoo, I ate and I don’t have to poop!” and then I went to check laundry in the basement and on the way up saw the sparkling twirling horror that is one of my most unmistakable visual aura symptoms.  Lower right visual field of my left eye is where it started, and holy cow did it spread fast.  I hadn’t even gotten the top off the med bottle and it was already unfurling a banner of evil sharp edged spectra across the entire field and into the right eye’s vision as well.  By the time I was laying down with ice packs in the dark, quiet bedroom, it had turned into a garland that drifted to the upper right of everything I saw, or didn’t see because with these things, they are there whether your eyes are open or closed.

Then the strangeness started.  I could move my hands but I couldn’t talk or even think about talking without feeling like, well, sick is one word for it.  A better likening is if you are a somewhat sensitive person and you imagine something violent and horrible happening to a specific part of your body…THAT sick horror feeling that is both emotional and physical?  That’s what certain perceptual/action events (and even imaginings of them) feel like when I have a migraine.  Which ones will be problematic varies.  Sometimes it’s motion (usually it’s motion) but this time it was sound, speech, language.  Music was similarly problematic.  This is unfortunate because I usually mutter or hum to myself when I’m migrainy like this and it helps take me out of my body.  Last night, I was stuck with having to do movement to get out, and I’m not accustomed to that.  I found small peripheral motions were better than large central ones, and breathing was a useful tool as well.

Today is a sick day.  I stayed home.  I still don’t feel good, as is also usual when I get a migraine like that.  My sister is planning to drive me to the appointment with Dr. Dumbfuck.  This whole episode raises the stakes on that significantly in that if I manage to drag my carcass there feeling like this, I’d better not be fucked about.

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  1. Oh man. My sister gets migranes and I can’t even imagne what you gals go through. She is currently taking nothing for pain, but uses peppermint essential oil and it seems to help her. I don’t want migraines thank you. Hope you feel better tommorrow.


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