B.A.T.H. time

It’s take your wife to work day…well for me anyhow.  or more properly for my husband.  I’m hanging out in his office, which is in a satellite campus of one B.A.T.H. after my pre-op “meet and greet” with surgeon number two at one of the other B.A.T.H.s ended early.  I could have tried to get into work, but my boss would probably find a way to screw me out of being paid for coming in.  I.e. I took the whole day based on my last appointment at this office (which took a loooooong time) and if I had come in early, there is nothing my boss has done to indicate that I would get that sick time credited back to me.  In fact, there are many things she’s done to indicate that I would NOT get it back.  Plus, I’d have been going in in jeans.  Oh dress code violation.  Very important.  And lastly, it’s not busy at work right now.  Ok, not lastly.  Lastly is that my boss has been harassing me for the last day and a half about my not being in 3 minutes after my start time (I’m scheduled for half past the hour, she sent the email at :33).  I punched in at :35, which means I was in the building even while she was off sending the email looking for me.  We’ve been having an email discussion, which I believe is about whether her commenting on is a reprimand or warning and which she thinks…well I don’t know what she thinks.  Not much and not well, I suspect.

Given all that, given that I am only allowed to take sick days in half or whole day chunks, and that speeding from surgery appointment to work I would have gotten in for 2.5 hours and not 4, I did not go in.  My husband on the other hand, offered to take me home or do something else, or I could come in with him to hit two work meetings where he would have been missed if he’d stayed out too.  I chose to come with him.

So I got to meet the gang.  And make some phone calls.  No, the vet does not know what made my cat so horribly sick so quickly.  Yes, my primary did send the referral for today’s surgical appointment.

Today’s surgical appointment. I have time so I may as well write it now.  Hubby’s probably going to be a few more minutes.

Total hysterectomy kids.  Ok, maybe not total.  I can’t keep total and radical straight.  Cervix plus uterus.  Leaving ovaries or an ovary if they aren’t a mess “which I doubt” the surgeon added.  Actually, despite a comment like that out of context, his manner was much more pleasant and open than what I expect of surgeons.  The doubtfulness came more as an affirmation of what I already know from pain, surgeries, and imaging.  It was kind of nice to have a doctor who wasn’t all “hey you never know…it could be all good when we go in.  I could find a prize or a pot of gold!”  I hate that crappy optimism.  I like realistic optimism, but I have a very low threshold for being bullshat and pushed to that false chipper hey it’s all great when me and my body know IT IS NOT.

I will be admitted at least for one night.  “With endo, we usually have more extensive work to do than with a hysterectomy for other reasons,” he said and paused.  I asked “and so the admit is for pain control?”  he nodded.  Ok again, I respect that.

I am a little torn on the cervix.  He said there were three recent studies showing that removing the cervix reduces the need for repeat surgery and that one they just concluded (a nine year diary study) showed no increased incident of sexual, urinary, or bowel dysfunction or of vaginal prolapse.  Ugh.  Jeeesus I hope not, all that sounds pretty horrible.  But right now, I am having considerable sexual consequences of the endo, and who knows if the bowel is related.  So.  I’m going to talk to a friend of mine who did this surgery.  I think she had them leave her cervix and has regretted it.

I also talked to the surgeon about the joint pain and asked if there is a way that they can use something to help reduce the strain on the joints during surgery.  I had read about soft collars for the neck and using sandbags.  He made a note and said “certainly…but please do remind us pre-operatively.”

And last, I got my FML form filled out.  We went with three and a half weeks off, with the understanding that if I need more or less, it can be amended.  Once I have that submitted, I will tell my boss.  I tried to do it the other way around last summer and ended up in a bad situation.  Not going there again.

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4 Comments

  1. I feel a bit relieved for you and that’s kinda effed up considering you’ll be having a hysterectomy. I just somehow have a sense of peace as I read this. Sounds like you’re in good hands and all is in order. You’re in control of the situation as much as a patient can be. I hope you feel okay about it. Do you?

    I know nothing about this subject matter other than a friend who has gone through a hysterectomy at age 30 and she let me know what I am in for re: menopause. I didn’t know they came together and probably should have. She’s a couple of years post-op – please let me know if you would like me to ask her any questions. She is very straightforward.

    I’m glad you got to spend time with your husband today instead of the witch at work. One thing I am especially optimistic about is the power of TLC – not that it cures anything but it can sure be just what we need. And pretty powerful sometimes.

    Thinking of you lots.

    Reply
    • I do feel ok. A little, apprehensive about the cervix issue. The surgeon I consulted with last spring had said we could retain it. But that guy also had recommended a around of Lupron, which I’ve tried to avoid after hearing from so many people that it was quite bad. If they can leave an ovary, I won’t have an early menopause – that’s the goal at least.

      I was relieved I didn’t have to plead for hospital stay to get good pain control immediately post op. I had a friend who had a hysterectomy a few years ago and they wanted to do it as a same day surgery affair.

      Having my husband there was excellent. He’s amazing. TLC counts for a lot.

      Reply
  2. R. G. Maines

     /  November 23, 2010

    I pleaded for a hysterectomy years ago when the doctor treated me for 9 month long cycles, excessive bleeding and horrid cramps. They refused, found that my body wasn’t producing progesterone.

    The only thing I know first hand is that my mother had a partial hysterectomy (uterus alone) and years later had to have another surgery to remove her ovaries and cervix. I think I’d rather have one surgery and just take it all, than go back in under anesthesia again.

    A friend of mine was 34 when she had a hysterectomy. They had to take her uterus and ovaries, so she did have menopausal symptoms. It’s my understanding that as long as you have one ovary you shouldn’t have menopausal symptoms or require hormone therapy.

    If I could have had a hysterectomy, I would have thrown a party! Seriously! I’m dealing with the final stages of peri-menopause now and it sucks!

    Good Luck!!! Have a good Thanksgiving! Will be thinking about you! ((Hugs))

    Reply
    • That sounds like fibroids symptoms, which would go with your mother’s history too. I agree with you about anesthesia. I’ve had two laps and they sucked for recovery post op. Puking, lots of pain, and god the fatigue. I don’t want to do this only to go back under in another three years.

      Thanks for the thanksgiving wishes. We’re going to be having a cozy event here at the homestead. My sister in law bailed so it’s just me, husband, and my sibs. Now if only they can behave… We just need to find a couple of good movies I think. 🙂

      Reply

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